May 22nd, 2019

I am just trying to figure this all out...at 11:04pm while everyone else, even my extremely loyal dog that never leaves my side has gone off to bed...
So, I'm doing it again; pulling a Cher, or a Madonna, or Swift or a GaGa...Re-inventing myself; re-booting my business...i've been in photography since high school, yes, i keep showing my age here.  After a few degrees and a few decades in the science field, I left the pharma world and became a Stay at Home mom, and because of the way of the world, it was difficult to find a job with a home/life/work/life balance, because everyday, the juggle is a struggle, let's be real. 
I opened a photography studio, dove in i'd say like most SAHM's do with a business, get good enough so people will want to pay you and make a few bucks here and there until the juggle becomes too difficult and you have to drop something...yes, for me that was work...we found out when my son was around 2 that he had severe and multiple food allergies; by multiple, i mean 7 PAGES of allergies; everything from broccoli and tomatoes, to wheat, corn, soy, eggs, dairy, nuts, chlorine, grass, the list was crazy!  we learned the hard way that there's wheat in play-doh!  (oh yes there is!)..., so i left the little job i had, that i was passionate about, and getting to make a few bucks with because my main jjob was the kiddos, we have 2 running around this house....years later, after the allergies had left his body...(that's an entire other story that ill be happy to share someday), I decided i needed something for me...so, i went back to work, as a photographer again...This time, I actually opened a studio and i didn't know WHAT would happen....luckily i still had clients and the were coming back and sending their friends and family members and word of mouth, a few ads and some hustling later, I am very busy...but not just with work; with home stuff, because what i realized is...i never gave anything up; im still the one taking care of the household and volunteering at school, taking the kids to sports, birthday parties, and all of their other activities plus in addition to....i'm now a business owner, trying to grow a business, and keep a balance; however, realizing just how hard it is.  im 4 1/2 months into this and needing editing help....the taking photos is one thing; the culling, sifting, editing afterward is another ballgame; i  it so much, but the time...its so time consuming
so i'm trying to figure out...what to give up....like, what if instead of hiring an editor, i hire a cook to cook meals for my family, or dog walker or house cleaner, gardener, etc...where my money be best spent? and where would my time be best spent?  that's where i'm at right now, trying to figure it all out...so, for those of you out there that are familiar with  'burning the candle at both ends', how do you do it, besides getting no sleep? I already wake up at 4:30 am to take a morning exercise class, and hustle all day long...this is not good for my health,this lack of sleep and lack of eating correctly, what has worked for you?  I'd love to know.  i should add we don't have family to help; grandparents have matured out of the years of watching kids and our siblings all have families and multiple activities and jobs to juggle as well...and honestly, is it worth it? if i start paying for a cook and house cleaner, will all of my profits be going to them?  so what's the sense?  how do i make this work?? how did YOU make it work??